in the name of honour

Honour in some parts of india is defined by defying the means of social and traditional destabilization, and protecting the age old traditional values,  regardless of the means used, regardless of the ends perceived and achieved. Here I am talking about the crime associated with the name ‘honour killing’. Rampant in northern india and also in parts of Pakistan, it has brought the ideas of liberal democracy and modernism at crossroads. The constitution now finds itself helpless in implementing these to over these regions.

Recently a girl from yadav community was brutally killed for eloping with a punjabi boy. After killing, the body was swiftly cremated and all the rituals were followed. the excuses given laughably bizarre. The incident here poses many questions and brings to the fore many issues.

Why are we tolerating these till now? Well no, the supreme court has already in its judgement has pronounced that each individual has the right to choice. Choice here refers to the selecting the life partner according to own wishes. It has severely condemned the practices as derogatory and antithetical to Indian ethos.

What about the khaps? These structures are as permanent as any of the institution you will find in india. Tradition has imbibed the values in the minds and hearts as a rock. Many practices are dismissive, perverse but still are followed. still one just cannot wish away the institution of khap. At the smallest level these are the work mobilizers of the northern india. Any external force contriving to induce change shall be faced with resistance. Even if coercely imposed, these rebel activities will go-on secretively, with beatings and killings and atrocities. Khaps are linked with the lives of people. People have not seen the community functioning without the khaps. So change has to cautious.

What are the choices in front of a girl? The choice statement given by the supreme court, has been followed not in the right spirit, in fact there is no proof that it is even followed. the girl child is often under tremendous pressure to go with customary or filial choices. Perceiving that her decision is inextricably linked to her family’s honour she most often drinks that bitter sip or that rather gulps with eyes closed and fearful and all senses tightened.

The other question arises here is about the liking of girl child with family’s honour. Parents often boast of their daughter married off to a rich business house. The same parents feel ashamed when they couldn’t find a suitable groom(or I should say a family) for her or if she is married in a poor house. Its our society’s menace which still I couldn’t understand till now, probably because I have never delved into it before or may be because I have been away from such influences or may be because I am not of a rural origin where I can experience such cases and extract some reason and causes behind it.

Seriously it’s a hats off to being a female in this country, and that to poor. Talks of india shining and winds changing are a still nonsense in the remote hinterlands of india. Here, starting from her inception in the womb, till she falls on her grave, the number of atrocities that she amazingly accepts and sometimes revolts, resists is phenomenal. I sometimes doubt my courage and question myself as to me having that kind of courage.

The repeated stories like these heartily disturbs me a lot. the very meaning of being Indian is a mix up of various communities. Its been the Indian story dating back 5000 years. Why then people are hell bent to disturb the very indianness of Indian people. Inter-caste were promoted by BR Ambedkar and Mahatma Gandhi. If these intellectuals are promoting them then our rationale should reflect upon ourselves to propagate their ideas deep in the soils of india.

Having pledged ourselves to maintain the unity and diversity of this holy land its our responsibility, we who are capable and possessed with necessities to educate and correct the malpractices that are rampant in the different parts of india. But mind you, this will be a labyrinth task, will demand enormous time resource and will power.

Any Change that has to come, has to come from within, the people alone themselves have the responsibilities to change, we can only act as facilitators and educators. For it education is must. Inculcation of modern and rational values is imperative. The unlearning has to be incremental, and not radical, otherwise the whole effort goes draining. The government can incentivize schemes that encourage inter caste marriages in the form of subsidies and rebated education of their child and scholarships.

So lets be a little respectful of our nation, lets show some sympathy towards the ‘other’ gender, lets follow ethics enshrined in the constitution and liberal ideas propagated by the nation’s greats. Lets build a strong india. Lets build india for what its known for, for what it has carried itself through ages and epochs.